Why Am I Cursed??

I had almost completely forgotten that I hadn't done my UV yesterday. After all I had been busy and it just completely skipped my mind. I know I promised to do it but I had burnt (well scalded) my hand when I was dishing up dinner ~ gosh it hurt like the dickens!! But I thought well .. I did promise I would do it and I hate breaking promises!

So while I was getting nuked in front of the unit I kept looking at the timer. I swear time seemed to just drag on and on. I know I'm only doing 2 mins 15 secs at the moment but it seemed to take FOREVER!!! Having so much time on your hands doing nothing but stand in front of the UV unit is NOT a good thing. It gave me too much thinking time even if it did give me a break from the boys continuous fighting/arguing! And boy did they fight a lot today.

I had this horrible, overwhelming feeling of being cursed! I know it's silly but that's how I felt. I kept thinking "WHY ME?? What did I do to deserve this horrid condition?? What could I have possibly done wrong as a kid to end up with P??" I know a lot of us P sufferers go though this Why Me stage and get really depressed and blue. Its no wonder so many of us with P have been diagnosed with chronic depression. I just wanted the timer to go off so I could finish this thing and get out of my room!!

Then I began thinking about all of the wonderful people I have met online who also have P. My wonderful soul sister, Diva, and my lovable psychic lady, Gail, plus all the others. There have been some great friendships made because of this horrid beast so I really shouldn't complain. It's just that at times this gets to you and you feel like you are being punished. Silly huh!

Not long after the timer went off and I had completed my nuking session for the day I went in to speak to Mark. I had to ask him if he thought my skin had improved a little since I began doing my UV. He told me that it had. It looked much better than it did a couple of weeks ago.

I should be greatful that there has been an improvement. I just forget to think of all the positives. Maybe I need to remember them more often!!